Absence

 

 

 

It seems like ages ago since we walked together in the rains. When you looked at me, it was as if a world had moved and a new chapter began in our epic story. You and I have changed faces, shapes and lives altogether in the meantime. 

 

In those days, your name was a chant that I would utter from morning till I lie down at night, imagining your arms around me.In those days, being away from you was never an agony for you were always around; at least I was so sure of your heart’s desire to be with me all the time. 

 

Now, eons later, I wither in the agony of your absence, howling at times, weakened by a love that needs togetherness as much as it needs assurance.Now, a desire to be with you overwhelms every feeling that I have ever known, much to my angst.

Bitterness

This little life has known ups and downs and plateaus. There were moments of great strife when the mind showed great courage and lived life to the fullest. Slump was the result when there was nothing to fight for and normal life was lived when days were all the same with nothing eventful between waking up and going to sleep.

Occasionally, there were those nightmarish times when it turned into nothing but a series of misfortunes one after another, when the heart had to face troubles all by itself and there was nobody who could help or listen. It was such a point of life, a quieter me evolved, who does not explain herself to anybody or anything and is happy with whatever life drops in these outstretched pair of hands.

How will you know, who became a tormented soul so late unlike me, one who has tormented each and every one of your listeners every day with your contagious chalice of bitterness about being open-minded and living in the moment? I have my days of bitterness; but looking carefully I understand that all these words of bitterness were a whiff from your putrefaction.

Ineffable

Eternal and strong, water-like, your love comes to me,
With the aid of silences and a few gestures of affection.
Where else can you come, when denied a real meeting,
You choose to drape yourself with words in dreams.

Ideal and true, my shy one, you shine bright in words,
When all the others have gathered here around me,
To know the truth with its many facets and versions,
Your memory lights up my soul with more words.

Witty and understanding, you past antics bring laughter
And so many words piled up on pages and pages,
So many lost, so many forgotten, so many yet to be,
All that found shape around an unforgettable you.

The one behind the words is ineffable, magical, eternal,
So apart from all the ones who think they spur words.

Message in a bottle

When I sat before you, with my heart beating,
There were a few words that I wanted to say,
You in your impatience didn't want to hear, 
My desire for you be around me forever.

I want you to drink me with your dark eyes,
Like the way you drink your black coffee
I want you to consume me like you devour
The huge pot of dessert set before you.

I want you to forget what happened earlier,
I want you to forget the worries of tomorrow,
Abandon all the lies that we say aloud daily,
And let the heart reign over reason for once.

What we have left before us is the present,
Where you need to be with me as my love.

Sleep

Once, it meant waking up warm in your arms,
Aroused by the smell of your coffee perfume,
The lazy mornings that ended in surprises,
Watching TV series or eating out as well.

Now, it means counting sheep till you sleep,
With a wish for a sleep without end often,
For our days turn too weary to say the least,
This old soul has re-learnt its ancient tirade.

This sullen heart longs for your presence,
The invisible net that could catch my fall,
For the ties that one broke in reckless fury,
Or the gentle promises that were forgotten.

The twilight brings in a taste of your perfume,
And a loneliness that will not go away too soon.