periods

memory

be humble

A song for you

Of all the songs that have been made,
For you, until they turn old and fade, 

This one is short and may be the best,
In this world, I love you the most.

Let new songs come and years pass,
I cant find a word that rhymes with pass..;-)
(well, I can, what i mean is I don't want to)

Don't have much to say,only new words,
Come and take place of the old ones.

Scent of rain

The earth forgets the scorching summer,

At the first drop of pelting rain

And its scents are translated into perfumes

Waterlily

Just to take this picture, I kept an alarm and woke up early to everyone' s surprise.  Anyway, this picture has come out so well out that I have  made it into my blog-picture. 

You and Me

You and I don't have anything common between us apart from our love for words. You love stringing words together; beautiful words that collide against my mind, when I encounter them somewhere in books. They show how you have been digging words, their meanings and their various tones to paint pictures.

While here I sit and sweat trying to express what is on my mind; for words fail when it comes to what I feel for you. So I try to explain mystery after mystery, glance after glance, suddenly remembered conversations that bring you clear before me.

You and I have been away from each other for too long. Sometimes, I find that the colour of your words have faded and died. It has nothing to do with me, I know, but the fact is that  it no longer makes me laugh or cry unlike earlier and I long for those unwritten words of yours.

A sacred space

For a time, life meant complete relaxation. Getting up late, making black tea and later lunch, listening to favourite songs (which prompted a question from a curious neighbour who thought it was a guy who played music), checking mails, replying to them and sitting to read on my favourite chair.

That chair was like a haven. The view was restricted with a wall, sometimes with a cat on it, the road you can see at a distance, the neighbour's houses (where at night, the sound of the lady scraping the last bit of food from the vessel for her husband could be heard in my room even with the windows closed) and a guava tree.

On days when I cleaned my room, after the work is done, I would sit and stare, first at my ultra-clean room with white floor (God, I miss my room, with the neatly arranged furniture, whose position I change during every cleaning session, though I am no blood relative of Tuglaq) and after a while at the scene outside. Once or twice I have seen the neighbour plucking the ripe fruits from the guava tree. Anyway, the ripe smell of its soft tasty flesh reached me all those times.

Once, on an idle day, I saw that this guava tree has a strange resemblance to a human form (with a well-shaped posterior) though upside down, with intertwined arms like an ancient supplicant praying incessantly to the gods. I even made a rough sketch of this sight. 

Now living with a husband who runs a chidiyakhana (he’s fond of pets and keeps two cages of budgies in the room) that drives me mad at times, I miss my room of single days- my neat sparkling room with a lot of space and with a good view. 

peace

Unhappy Endings

 I was only ten when I learnt about unhappy endings.

Like when I knew my grandmother had cancer,

I kneeled in churches, for God answers a kid’s prayers, they said.

She died and I didn’t meet her to say one goodbye.

She looked like a horrible nightmare,

Not the one you saw last, not the one you loved,

A swollen, ugly remnant of what was once beloved, they said.

Once botched goodbye, an unresolved parting for a little girl,

There were no tears for her, only numbness that didn’t feel real,

From that chirpy girl who never gave her a proper burial,

Who died a little that day, with prayers unanswered,

Full of questions but never with answers or resolutions,

Now, I’ve grown older with bungled muted loves,

Improper goodbyes, giving up too easily, too easily. 

Find that rainbow day

Love

practice

compassion

enjoyment

suffering

Tales of love

In the dark rainy nights,
She sang lullabies to us,
In a very sweet voice.

The stories lived before us,
Brave knights and lovely ladies,
All fighting for love.

Both of us, listened wide-eyed
Lying on each of her arms,
As truth and love ruled.

Little did she know of its truth,
As we grew older, we realised,
With pain and disillusionment.

How our childish hearts soaked up,
These unreal tales of happiness,
And real love, truth and honour.

She said, love makes us whole,
She sang, never forget your truth.
She sang you are special.

Now aged and crooked, she sits,
She has lost her sweetness
And we, our innocence.

For him, love is sad and lost,
For me, love is cruel and lost,
For her, life is lonely and gone.

Yet the old hope in tales flicker,
When we meet a smile,
Of understanding in her eyes.

Patience

Unending Love by Tagore

I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times,
In life after life, in age after age, forever.
My spell-bound heart has made and re-made the necklace of songs
That you take as a gift, wear round your neck in your many forms
In life after life, in age after age, forever.

Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, its age-old pain,
Its ancient tale of being apart or together,
As I stare on and on into the past, in the end you emerge
Clad in the light of a pole-star piercing the darkness of time:
You become an image of what is remembered forever.

You and I have floated here on the stream that brings from the fount
At the heart of time love of one for another
We have played alongside millions of lovers shared in the same
Shy sweetness of meeting, the same distressful tears of farewell – 
Old love, but in shapes that renew and renew forever.

Today it is heaped at your feet, it has found its end in you,
The love of all man’s days both past and forever:
Universal joy, universal sorrow, universal life,
The memories of all loves merging with this one love of ours
And the song of every poet past and forever.

happiness